Mommy Dreamin

Cautiously expecting sometime in June 2006!!

Monday, January 31, 2005


Temp: 97.4
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 33
DPO: New Cycle

Saturday I took another pregnancy test and it was a very faint negative. Saturday's temperature was 98.0. Sunday's temp was 97.6. This dip confirms I'm not pregnant. Today's temp also comfirms it as it dips well below the coverline. However, no period yet. Very faint pink this morning, but no period. I did put down spotting for the reason I just stated, which makes a new cycle. Cramping like crazy, but no actual period yet. Odd, but as I'm getting better at this charting stuff, I think we'll do good this comng month.

Happy Monday.

Friday, January 28, 2005

Trying to not be hopeful

Temp: 98.1
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 30
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

I'm on cycle day 30 now and I'm afraid to be a little hopeful. It's a little something I do every month, called beat yourself up when ttom finally comes.

I keep telling myself not to get my hopes up. I'm too worried about becoming pregnant, that I stress myself out, delay ovulation and mistake a long cycle for being pregnant. And of course there's the symptoms you're sure you're having, like tender breasts, morning sickness (which I've had all my life-I wouldn't know the difference) and other various symptoms. All I can do is wait. Last month my cycle was 32 days. How can I help if this month I go past 32 days, and I'm jumping up and down for joy?

Thursday, January 27, 2005

A ride

Temp: 98.2
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 29
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

A little spike today in my temperature. Rough night, so I'm attributing it to stress.

I cannot wait for this week to be over already. A roller-coaster of a ride and I want off now.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Temp: 97.9
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 28
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Missing in Action

Temp: 97.8
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 27 ;)
DPO: Unknown/unclear

So, yesterday I ate it and went to the doctor to find out what is wrong with me. We were there a while...

Pain I've been having: Could be anything, could be an infection somewhere. Blood was given, so I'll get the results today. Also wants me to follow up again with my liver to make sure the enzymes aren't still high.

Breast pain: Let's be honest my body still isn't the same way it was when I was an 18 year old on birth control. I am a 40E, pain is normal now. Everywhere.

So, after a funeral yesterday, I made it in to the doctor and broke down in her office. She asked me why I was so scared I wouldn't be able to have kids. I told her I didn't know. I honestly don't know.

She told me to join yoga...

::blinks eyes::

It's probably a good idea for my sanity huh?

Friday, January 21, 2005

Temp: 98.2
Time Taken: 6:05am
CD: 23

Everyone have a good weekend and behave yourselves!

Thursday, January 20, 2005

So this is what tired is?

Temp: 97.9
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 22
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

I've never needed this much sleep lately. I can't get enough of it. I got 8 hours last night and woke up still tired. Boy, when we do get pregnant, am I in for a rude awakening or what??

Wednesday, January 19, 2005


Temp: 97.8
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 21
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

I'm afraid. I've always been afraid. What I'm speaking of is my health. The diagnos-yourself sites are my worst enemy. I would call myself a true hypochondriac except for the fact that everytime I go in for something, it's there. If I freakin knew when I ovulated, then I would chalk my pain up to cysts again, or ovulation pain. But, to look at my chart, it's seems as though I ovulated three times this month. Yeah, three.... That's not at all possible. Since I had pain during intercourse this month, it makes me believe I have cysts again. Except the first time I noticed them, I ruptured them. So, I'm headed back to the OBGYN on Monday. For pain (which I'm sure an ultrasound will be in order) and breast soreness/tenderness, which I've never had before. I'm cramping which is odd because I don't think I'm even due to start for another two weeks. Arghh!! This not knowing stuff is killing me. Literally, I'm so stressed about this. I wish you could get a checkup for everything in the world. An MRI of your entire body to check for every disease or problem known to mankind. Even if everything came back fine, I know myself too well to know that I'd be back the next week wanting it done again. Just to be safe...

So I'm left to search the internet aimlessly, one symptom leading me to this and then it could be that, or this even. It's a vicious cycle. I ask myself the "whys" too. Why did I have to go on B.C. in the first place? Why did I not take better care of myself from the start? I have so many of these things in my head I can't even think straight.

And I feel like the doctors dismiss me too quickly. Would I feel better if they found something this time? Almost. Then I would have a building block to build on. I don't know, I automatically assume something is wrong with me and it's only been 3 months of TTC. People try for years before they feel this way. If it wasn't for the pain, I don't think I would suspect a problem yet either. Why do I have a feeling my being overweight is hindering the process that much more?

::sigh:: And with that, I've lost my train of thought, lucky for you or I could go on all day about my woes. It's the type of mood I'm in right now.

It's a dark cloud, bear with me, it'll pass...

Tuesday, January 18, 2005


Temp: 97.8
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 20
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

A german word meaning "middle pain". Mittel-something-or-other. I think I mentioned that once I got off birth control, I started getting a pain every month and at some point, I believe the first month off, I doubled over in pain after intercourse because of it. So I went in for an ultrasound and my OBGYN told me I had ruptured a cyst. I thought cysts were bad, but she said this meant I was ovulating. So, I didn't have it so bad since then, but last night was deja vu. Only during the day I'd felt crampy and then later that night I recognized the tender stomach and thought maybe I'd ruptured another and that there was just blood in my belly as before.

So, I'm thinking that cysts are not such a good thing and of course I look into every possibility on the internet, just to freak myself out that much more. Here's what I came up with:

Fibroid Tumors

I think this is enough to occupy my mind until the cows come home.

I'm already looking into endocrinologists.

Monday, January 17, 2005

It's the waiting thats the worst

Temp: 97.6
Time Taken: 6:00am
CD: 19
DPO: Unknown/unclear

Sunday, January 16, 2005

Dance Revolution

Temp: 97.4
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 18
DPO: Unknown/Unclear

Does anyone else have the game Dance Revolution? I got it for Christmas and I am absolutely addicted. I play whenever I can and I'm hooked. Good workout too.

Once I turn that sucker on, it's all over for me. :)

Saturday, January 15, 2005

Oh Saturday

Temp: 97.8
Time Taken: 6:30am
CD: 17
DPO: Unknown

Aaron's working today and I have my niece's birthday party to go to. When I get home though.....I'm shutting the curtains, and bustin a move while cleaning the house.

I love Saturdays :)

Friday, January 14, 2005


Temp: 97.7
Time Taken: 6:30am

Aaron made me laugh so hard last night I couldn't catch my breath and I got so dizzy. Result: The biggest headache this morning for me.
Anyways, an attempt was made last night and I recorded this and my temperature on my online chart and it took away my ovulation date. A message popped up to indicate my data wasn't consistent anymore with that of a person who has ovulated. So I don't know if I have or haven't yet. Since the first day of my last period was December 30th, the next three days would be 'typical' for when I would be most fertile and ovulate, so I'll look for that spike again to see if perhaps I ovulate if I haven't already.

At first glance of my chart it looked very good. Although I honestly don't think it was possible for my to ovulate the day after stopping my menses, so I'm glad they changed the chart. There was even a dip after my "o date" which could have meant implantation. But, like I said, this months temps have been all over so I'm just going to keep watch for now and see what happens.

Happy Friday!

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Hopefully out of my system

Temp: 97.7
Time taken: 6:30am
CD: 15
DPO: 7

According to my chart however, I ovulated on day 8. The next day after I stopped spotting. This is odd, but I'm chalking it up to that pesky birth control getting out of my system. I hope.
A pregnancy test was taken on CD 12, which came back negative. This was also 4 days past my supposed ovulation, so I'm not surprised.

A little background: Temps were sporadic this month and last months cycle was extremely long. I've been temping for 2 months now and have been pretty unremarkable. However, this month, my temps have been all over the place. I was sick with the worst flu of my life at the beginning of this month so that may have had an effect.

Going to make an attempt tonight, dream of lullabies!

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Welcome to my Website

I am beginning this blog to chart my journey, which hopefully results in a pregnancy. My husband and I were married in October of 2004 and are now wishing to start our family. As of today, we have been TTC (trying to conceive) for 2 months. We were unsuccessful both times, but are not disheartened yet because I just got off birth control at the end of October and I'm hoping that it just takes some time to get out of my system. Things are going to get personal here for me, because it will help me keep things fresh in my mind and detect patterns, so no comments saying I'm giving out too much information. I don't want to hear it.

The method I'm chosing to follow while TTC is taking my basal temperature every morning and also paying attention to my CM to determine when I'm most fertile. The posts and or advice I chose to write about and/or follow should NEVER be followed by anyone who reads this site and should also NEVER be taken in place of a doctor's advice. Always consult your doctor before ever making changes to your lifestyle/well being.

Good wishes and prayers are always appreciated!

Dreaming of a bun in the oven,